What should I wear?
Does this match?
Which of these look best with this?
I get these questions frequently from my husband, Todd, when he chooses his outfit for going out and about. For someone who says he doesn’t care what anyone else thinks, he sure puts a lot of thought into what he wears! Now that our outings are limited, I haven’t been asked those questions recently. Surprisingly, he hasn’t even asked me which mask to wear!
The Test
In our 30+ years of marriage, I can tell you how this scenario generally plays out. “Whatever you want” or “I don’t care” is my answer to the open-ended question. If we proceed to the next portion of the test, my odds of answering correctly increase, or so you would think. That’s because we move to the true-false (yes/no) or multiple choice section. Guess what? I rarely pass this test! If you would like to know why, read on.
Who Has the Answer Key?
You see, long before the first question is asked, Todd already has an answer set in his mind. He is just looking for confirmation from me. This is a subjective test and Todd holds the answer key! When I don’t give his predetermined answer, my test is marked incorrect. That leaves me feeling frustrated, wondering why he ever bothered to ask if he already had the answer.
Who is the Teacher?
Now that I’ve poked fun at Todd, I will assure you that he’s not alone. Just recently, while reading my current reading plan in YouVersion, I was convicted of having predetermined answers too. The plan is called “Trusting God – A Prayer Journey” and trusting God’s communication was the topic of the day. It became evident as I read that I sometimes do the same thing with God that Todd does with me when choosing his outfit. The situation is magnified by a horrific role reversal though—I appoint myself the teacher and God is the student!
I’ll pray about some concern that is heavy on my heart and ask for God’s direction in the matter. But, when it comes right down to it, do I really want His answer? Or do I just want God to affirm my predetermined answer? After all, I have the answer key. This has far more significant consequences than choosing an outfit! Ugh.
Who is Right?
Dare I get my red pen out along with my pride and mark God’s answer wrong when it doesn’t match the one on the key? Or do I humbly surrender to His will, knowing His answers are 100% correct. He NEVER got one wrong. Ever. And never will! I have gone the former route more times than I care to admit, but, as I continue to grow closer to God, I find myself choosing the latter more and more.
Voice Recognition
As you and I spend time with God, the perfect teacher, we will more readily recognize His voice. It can be heard in a variety of forms. For me, the struggle is to be still long enough to hear what He wants to say. That is probably a lesson for a different day! Nevertheless, it’s hard not to act on my predetermined answers. The beautiful thing is that God will redeem even that. His answers come as we listen along our journey.
“You will hear your Teacher’s voice behind you. You will hear it whether you turn to the right or the left. It will say, “Here is the path I want you to take. So walk on it.””
Isaiah 30:21 NIRV
Leading From Behind
God is ready, willing, and able to provide direction. But, isn’t it curious that He leads from behind? I believe that’s because He has no intention of ever taking away our free will. He will tell us which way to go, if we tune in, but, ultimately, that decision is ours to make. When we make a wrong turn, our route is recalculated to get us back on the path. The trip just takes longer. Just ask the Israelites! They wandered around in the desert for 4 decades when their journey to the Promised Land could have been measured in days, weeks, or months. I’m thinking they made a few wrong turns along the way. But they made it nonetheless!
We will reach our destination too. ETA is TBD. It all depends on how many wrong turns we make! Remember, the shortest distance between two points is a straight line.