My dad was quite a character! He loved a good laugh, whether he was the one chuckling or the one who caused others to bust a gut. As his quality of life declined over the past year, he still managed to be a source of laughter, even in the midst of his pain.
A Real Character
One of my favorite memories goes back to the night we were changing our calendars to a new century. Leading up to that night, there was a lot of apprehension in the world concerning the coming Y2K. Many a theory was hatched regarding what might happen when the clock struck midnight that night. My parents had their whole family gathered at their farmhouse to ring in the year 2000. As midnight approached, we were all gathered around the TV to watch the ball drop in New York City. Unbeknownst to the rest of us, my dad managed to sneak out of the room. When the clock struck 12:00, the power went out and we sat in total darkness. Well, almost. My brother looked out the window and happened to notice that there was a light on out at the barn. That’s when we figured out that Dad was behind the power outage. He went to the basement and threw the breaker off to the whole house at the precise arrival of Y2K! We, including my dad, laughed until our sides hurt. That is, once the power was restored!
With Character
Yes, he was quite a character. More importantly, he possessed character admired by many. That was evident on the Thursday afternoon of his funeral when the church was full of people wanting to join us in celebrating his 91 plus years of life here on earth.
Putting Thoughts into Words
Those who know me have come to know that writing is my therapy. It is my way of processing what’s on my mind. Unfortunately, in the days following my dad’s death, we were so busy with all the tasks that come with planning a funeral, that the only thing I wrote was an obituary, and that was a group effort! Finally, after my family had all gone to bed the night before the funeral, I sat in front of my computer and wrote an acrostic using my dad’s name to express my thoughts.
My Dad
JOYFUL – He never complained and made the best of every situation
AUTHENTIC – He was the same person in public as he was in private
YOUNG-AT-HEART – He kept going in spite of his pain, never wanting to miss out
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LIKABLE – I don’t know of anyone who didn’t like him
UNCONDITIONAL – A word to describe his love for his family
TAKE-CHARGE – He was a quiet leader who always pursued solutions
HARDWORKING – He made sure the cows were milked twice a day, 365 days a year
EXCEPTIONAL – A word to describe his character
RELIABLE – A man of his word
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HANDY – A jack of all trades, able to fix anything
IRREPLACEABLE – How will we go on without him?
LOGICAL – A problem solver with no shortage of common sense
LOYAL – We could always count on him
EARNEST – He earned the trust of others with his honesty
GENEROUS – Always giving of his time, talents and money
AMBITIOUS – He never quit
SIMPLE – An uncomplicated, humble child of God
STEADY – He provided stability in the midst of challenges
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That is just a sampling of some adjectives I would use to describe my dad. It was only fitting that I chose his name as my guide that night as I sat in front of my computer trying to put my thoughts into words. My dad was, and still is, uniquely identified by the name, Jay Luther Hillegass.
What’s in a Name?
Solomon, the author of the Book of Proverbs, is thought to be the wisest man of his time. When God gave him the opportunity to ask for ANYTHING he wanted as he prepared to assume the throne in Israel, Solomon chose wisdom. Here’s what Solomon has to say about a name:
“A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.”
Proverbs 22:1 NIV
That verse certainly packs a powerful punch, doesn’t it? I had the honor of watching my dad live out that verse from a front row seat for my entire life. He was rich, not so much in dollars and cents, but in character. That’s what I’ll remember most about my dad. It is my prayer that one day my kids will remember me as someone who sought to be a model of exceptional character through the guidance of the Holy Spirit as well.