Category: Peace

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Custom-Made

The Dress

Once we got the bride outfitted for the big day, it was my turn to find just the right attire for the mother-of-the-bride. That was a tall task, but eventually there was agreement on the best option for me. Mind you, we did all this online. I went to place my order and asked for some help by clicking “What size am I?”. That took me to a chart of measurements for the various sizes of the dress. I took my measurements and found them to be ALL over that chart. I think it may have been best to toss the dice to figure out which size to order! As a result, I ended up ordering a “try on” dress to determine if I liked it enough to have it made specifically for me. There is no turning back with a custom-made dress. If you order one, it’s yours—like it or not!

The Comparison Trap

This dress experience could be a metaphor for my life. I never did fit into the box very well! Being the youngest of my parents’ three daughters, I naturally looked up to and followed the lead of my older sisters. I still do! We grew up on a dairy farm and they both won the title of Somerset County Dairy Princess when they were 16. I succumbed to self-induced pressure to enter the contest when I got to that magical age as well. As it turned out, I crashed and burned during the pageant, completely freezing during the onstage interview. I can laugh about it now, but it was humiliating at the time. What was I thinking? I don’t even like milk!

Living Outside the Box

Whether it was my sisters, my classmates, or other peers along life’s journey, I always seemed to be comparing myself to others and coming to the conclusion that I just don’t fit into the box. There were times I was thrilled by that, like when I was the only girl on my Little League and Junior Legion baseball teams. But, more often than not, I felt like I just didn’t measure up. To me, it seemed like I was always living outside the box where I thought the “normal” people resided. Well, guess who constructed that box? Me! I was my own worst enemy.

The Impact of Two Books

You may have picked up on my use of the past tense in the preceding paragraph and are wondering what changed? And when? It was a book that was written 20 years ago AND a book that was written some 2000 years ago that changed my whole perspective.

Twenty years ago, Rick Warren wrote The Purpose Driven Life, and I participated in a church-wide study of it shortly thereafter. There were 40 readings, one for each day of the study. It was Day #2 that changed everything for me. The title of that reading is “You Are Not an Accident.” Perhaps you need to hear that today just as I did back then. Your parents may or may not have planned you, but God certainly did.

“You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.”

Psalms 139:13 NLT

We are custom-made by God. He made each one of us ON purpose, FOR a purpose. And guess what? God doesn’t make mistakes! That was a game-changer for me. My parents and yours possessed exactly the DNA God needed to create us.

“I am your Creator. You were in my care even before you were born.”

Isaiah 44:2a CEV

Let that sink in. We were custom-made BY God and FOR God before we even took our first breath. Our purpose for being here is to bring glory to God, but that will look different for each of us because we have been uniquely created by Him. Once that truth settled into my heart, I felt several pounds lighter. There was no longer a need to drag around my personal “measurement” box to see if I fit. I started living into who He created me to be, and that freedom refreshed my soul.

No Box Necessary

From the words of Christian artist, Francesca Battistelli, “I’m free to be me; And you’re free to be you.” God wouldn’t want it any other way.

The Perfect Fit

I entered my measurements and placed an order for that mother-of-the-bride dress that I tried on earlier. My custom-made dress should arrive in another month or so. No alterations necessary—I’m counting on it!

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Surrender or Control?

The word surrender generally evokes negative feelings, doesn’t it? The dictionary defines it as ceasing resistance to an enemy or opponent and submitting to their authority. It sounds a lot like giving up! Conversely, control is generally viewed in a positive light. Control is defined as the power to influence or direct people’s behavior or the course of events.

My flesh desires to be in control, not surrender. But spiritually speaking, I am called to surrender. In Christianity, that means believers completely give up their own will and subject their thoughts, ideas and deeds to the will of God. But He is not our enemy or opponent! No one did it better than the sinless Son of God, Jesus. He, in the ultimate act of surrender, died a criminal’s death on a cross to pay the penalty for our sins—past, present and future. That certainly gives me perspective when it comes to surrender!

Who is Really in Control?

I like to control outcomes, or at least think I do. But the truth is, I’m not in control at all. I spent two years attempting to avoid surgery on my left shoulder due to a previously failed surgery. After exhausting all non-surgical options about a year ago, I met with a new surgeon. He placed me on his schedule after two brief meetings in April. I was all set for surgery at the surgical center on May 25. Or so I thought!

Plan B

Upon further investigation, my surgical team concluded that, due to high risk, my surgery needed to be performed in a hospital. They called on May 23rd to tell me and reschedule my surgery. Needless to say, I was unhappy with the change of plans, more so when they said the soonest it could be done was July 9. During the wait leading up to my original surgery date, I wasn’t exactly at peace based on my interactions with the surgeon. Nonetheless, I had myself prepared to go through with it by the time the plan went up in flames.

Plan C

In spite of my anger, the rescheduling fiasco afforded me time to seek a second opinion from a surgeon I had seen over a decade ago for my original bad shoulder (right). Surprisingly, he made me feel like surgery was the best option. And he wasn’t afraid to do it, unlike 10 years ago! He listened intently to my history and set me up with the appropriate people to clear me for surgery on June 2.

His Plan

I share this story with you as an example of a blessing in disguise. In the absence of peace with the initial plan, I prayed that God would either give me that peace or put a stop to the surgery. But honestly, I wasn’t expecting the latter. I surrendered, yet, somehow, I still thought I was in control! Even though I prayed that prayer, I was still mad when the plan crumbled. It didn’t occur to me in that moment that this was the answer to my prayer. It was only after sleeping on it that I was able to look at it through a different lens and see it as an opportunity. I was reminded of one of my favorite verses:

“We know that God works all things together for good for the ones who love God, for those who are called according to his purpose.”

Romans 8:28 CEB

Notice it says ALL things, not some things. Things that seem anything but good are used by God FOR good. Our perspective is limited, but God’s isn’t. He sees the big picture. We can trust in His plan because He demonstrated His unfathomable love for us through Jesus.

By taking advantage of the unexpected opportunity to seek a second opinion, I found something additional in the process—His peace.

“Peace is what I leave with you; it is my own peace that I give you. I do not give it as the world does. Do not be worried and upset; do not be afraid.”

John 14:27 GNT

The Outcome

I went through with the surgery on June 2. It was a LONG summer of rehab, but when I turned the corner, I progressed quickly, much to the surprise of my therapist. By the time I finished PT, my right shoulder was once again the bad shoulder. I’ve grown accustomed to those limitations over the last 10+ years though. I’m thrilled to have one fully functional shoulder again.

With or Without Peace

Who is to say how things would have turned out with the first surgeon? Perhaps the outcome would be the same, but I don’t think we should sell peace short. Its presence, or lack thereof, made all the difference in my outlook in the days leading up to both surgery dates.

Surrender: The Key to Peace

I don’t know the trials that you are currently facing, but I want to encourage you to surrender control to Him. Seek the peace that only Jesus can give before taking your next step. You can trust in His plan, even when it doesn’t align with yours, knowing He will bring good from even the most difficult circumstances. That is my prayer for each one who is reading this post.

Until next time, you might find me out on a golf course. My successful surgery has allowed me to return to a game I once enjoyed following a 10+ year hiatus. The best part—it doesn’t hurt!

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Source

My Word for 2021

It’s that time of year again—time to choose a word and verse for the new year! Unlike last year, this word came to me rather quickly…and directly. In fact, it all started before I even went to church on the first Sunday of 2021. The devotional I used that morning talked about God as my SOURCE. I remember making a mental note of that word before I headed off to church. When my pastor announced his word and verse for the new year during the service, he encouraged us to choose ours too. At that time, I put the word SOURCE in my message notes as a definite possibility for 2021.

The Confirmation

Several years ago, I read a book written by Lysa TerKeurst titled, “What Happens When Women Say Yes to God.” In this book, Lysa devoted a chapter to how we can determine if God is speaking to us by asking ourselves five questions. One of those questions is to ask yourself if you are hearing the same thing from different sources. The very next day, the word SOURCE came up again in the daily story in YouVersion. By this time, I was feeling pretty confident that my word for the year was to be SOURCE. The kicker is what happened next though. After my quiet time with God, I went upstairs to get a shower. When I stepped in, there was a freshly unwrapped cake of soap waiting for me with the word SOURCE written on it. If you aren’t an Aldi shopper, that is the brand name of their soap. That was confirmation enough for me! I literally laughed out loud and said, “Ok, God, I get the message!”

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”

John 15:5 NIV

Selecting My Verse

The verse for 2021 was not quite as obvious, as many could serve as a reminder that God is my SOURCE. I had it narrowed down to three and finally settled on the verse above, John 15:5, just over a week ago. This happened to be the same day that my dad was admitted to the hospital and I was 1000 miles away from him. What a helpless feeling! With my mind racing and my emotions all over the map, I certainly needed the reminder that God is my SOURCE. He is the SOURCE of everything I need. The list is extensive, but peace was my greatest need that day. As always, the Prince of Peace provided. What I want you to take away from this post is not my word and verse for the year, but rather that He is the SOURCE of everything you need too.

Our Part and His Part

The Bible is packed with promises from God. Many of those promises come with a condition though. We are not just passive observers; we have a role to play. In John 15:5, our assignment is to stay connected to God. If a branch is separated from the vine, it’s dead wood. And that makes it powerless to bear fruit. Apart from Jesus, we are also powerless. He is our power SOURCE! The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22). It is only through the power of the Holy Spirit that others will see this fruit on display in the lives of His children. That is assuming we do our part. To bear fruit, we must remain connected to the SOURCE of our power.

Bear It and Eat It

All this talk of fruit is making me hungry for a different kind. I’m dreaming of my next trip to the strawberry farm. I find this fruit especially delicious this time of year in Florida, especially when shortcake and ice cream are connected to those strawberries!

Can you taste it?
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YOUR Room is Ready

I’ve been telling many of my friends and family, “YOUR Room is ready” for months now. Here I sit, writing in the car as my husband and I make our way south to FL to spend the winter with our daughter and escape the cold of Western PA. Hillary will be there for the next three years pursuing her doctorate degree in OT and needed housing so buying a townhouse was a win-win decision. There are three bedrooms in our townhouse. I affectionately refer to the third one as YOUR. You see, the hardest part of this whole snowbird thing is that we’re leaving a whole bunch of special people behind in PA. I miss them already! Though I’m looking forward to this new chapter, it’s somewhat bittersweet.

The passing of a loved one can also be a bittersweet experience, at least if that person is a follower of Jesus. While the heartache is real and painful, we rejoice that they are no longer in pain and suffering. It brings us comfort to know that they have reached their eternal home.

When my beloved 16-year-old nephew went to his heavenly home in 2007, the following scripture passage was read at his funeral & memorial service:

“Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going.”                                                                                                                   John 14:1-4 NIV

In the midst of deep grief, these words were comforting. Unlike our townhouse in FL, there are many rooms in God’s house. There WILL be room at this inn for all who believe. Your reservation was made the day you turned your life over to Jesus. And guess what? YOUR room will be ready! He will come for you and take you there at just the right time. He said so!

You may be familiar with these words from the chorus of the popular hymn When We All Get to Heaven:            (Sing it if you wish!) 

When we all get to heaven

What a day of rejoicing that will be

When we all see Jesus

We’ll sing and shout the victory…

If you are mourning the loss of a loved one, I pray you will find peace and comfort in knowing that one day, in His perfect time, you will be reunited. It will indeed be a day of rejoicing!

Until then, YOUR room is ready in FL (reservations required)!