The Dress
Once we got the bride outfitted for the big day, it was my turn to find just the right attire for the mother-of-the-bride. That was a tall task, but eventually there was agreement on the best option for me. Mind you, we did all this online. I went to place my order and asked for some help by clicking “What size am I?”. That took me to a chart of measurements for the various sizes of the dress. I took my measurements and found them to be ALL over that chart. I think it may have been best to toss the dice to figure out which size to order! As a result, I ended up ordering a “try on” dress to determine if I liked it enough to have it made specifically for me. There is no turning back with a custom-made dress. If you order one, it’s yours—like it or not!
The Comparison Trap
This dress experience could be a metaphor for my life. I never did fit into the box very well! Being the youngest of my parents’ three daughters, I naturally looked up to and followed the lead of my older sisters. I still do! We grew up on a dairy farm and they both won the title of Somerset County Dairy Princess when they were 16. I succumbed to self-induced pressure to enter the contest when I got to that magical age as well. As it turned out, I crashed and burned during the pageant, completely freezing during the onstage interview. I can laugh about it now, but it was humiliating at the time. What was I thinking? I don’t even like milk!
Living Outside the Box
Whether it was my sisters, my classmates, or other peers along life’s journey, I always seemed to be comparing myself to others and coming to the conclusion that I just don’t fit into the box. There were times I was thrilled by that, like when I was the only girl on my Little League and Junior Legion baseball teams. But, more often than not, I felt like I just didn’t measure up. To me, it seemed like I was always living outside the box where I thought the “normal” people resided. Well, guess who constructed that box? Me! I was my own worst enemy.
The Impact of Two Books
You may have picked up on my use of the past tense in the preceding paragraph and are wondering what changed? And when? It was a book that was written 20 years ago AND a book that was written some 2000 years ago that changed my whole perspective.
Twenty years ago, Rick Warren wrote The Purpose Driven Life, and I participated in a church-wide study of it shortly thereafter. There were 40 readings, one for each day of the study. It was Day #2 that changed everything for me. The title of that reading is “You Are Not an Accident.” Perhaps you need to hear that today just as I did back then. Your parents may or may not have planned you, but God certainly did.
“You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.”
Psalms 139:13 NLT
We are custom-made by God. He made each one of us ON purpose, FOR a purpose. And guess what? God doesn’t make mistakes! That was a game-changer for me. My parents and yours possessed exactly the DNA God needed to create us.
“I am your Creator. You were in my care even before you were born.”
Isaiah 44:2a CEV
Let that sink in. We were custom-made BY God and FOR God before we even took our first breath. Our purpose for being here is to bring glory to God, but that will look different for each of us because we have been uniquely created by Him. Once that truth settled into my heart, I felt several pounds lighter. There was no longer a need to drag around my personal “measurement” box to see if I fit. I started living into who He created me to be, and that freedom refreshed my soul.
No Box Necessary
From the words of Christian artist, Francesca Battistelli, “I’m free to be me; And you’re free to be you.” God wouldn’t want it any other way.
The Perfect Fit
I entered my measurements and placed an order for that mother-of-the-bride dress that I tried on earlier. My custom-made dress should arrive in another month or so. No alterations necessary—I’m counting on it!
Another great job Polly!Loved it!!
Such a great lesson and reminder for all of us. From what I have learned about life there are few of us, if any, who feel like we are enough and measure up. Comparison with others, and not an understanding and belief in the wonder and uniqueness of our own God-given being, is of our own making and part of our made up story. When I think of how much God loves me, I am free and I am me. How difficult that is to totally absorb … and how very easy. It just takes a moment. Thank you Polly.
Thank you for this reminder, Polly. (And, as always, very well stated!)
Very encouraging words, Polly. Most of us never really ‘fit into the box’ created for us, or created by our own minds. God, howver, makes no mistakes in His creating, so we can all take comfort in that and in the ‘finished product’ of ourselves. God Bless…keep on writing!